Twenty Things You Wish You Had Known Before Stepping on Greek Soil

Twenty Things You Wish You Had Known Before Stepping on Greek Soil 06/23/2009

So vacation is here, and it’s time to fulfill your life-long dream to travel to that beautiful Greek island or that amazing ancient ruin. You watched Mamma Mia a dozen times and you were first in line to see My Life in Ruins. You’re ready! Or, so you think… Think again. This is a must read for those of you traveling to the land of dazzling light and Aegean blues beyond your dreams. With these helpful hints-about the Greek elements that are not so lovely-you won’t be able to claim that we didn’t warn you:

     1. Yes, it is sad but true. You are directed to throw your used toilet paper not in the toilet, but in the bin next to the toilet. And, yes, this is true for most Grecian toilets. The claim is that the old pipes are not very wide and cannot accommodate toilet paper. I could provide you with illustrations that would support this claim, but I doubt you’d continue to read on, let alone actually take your trip to Greece if I did…so I’ll just ask you to take me at my word.

     2. Working hours are not what you’re use to in the U.S. Most banks, schools, shops, government agencies, doctors’ offices, and businesses shut down some time around 1:30pm-3:00pm and may not reopen at all. Those that do, reopen only a few days of the week and do so for only a couple of hours (around 6pm-8pm). Extra hint—if you are unfortunate enough to have to set foot in a bank, allow yourself an extra couple of hours.

     3. Usually, tavernas and restaurants do not open before 8pm. Most Greeks eat their main meal in mid-afternoon and have a small dinner sometime after 10pm.

     4. Forget about rushing anywhere or traveling on a set schedule. The weather, alone, may delay your trip by days or even weeks. That goes for Athenian travel as well. Unless you’re within walking distance or are driving a very small motorbike, traffic can be a bitch.

     5. Beware of taxi driver rip-offs. Learn the system. Check the meter. Unless it’s late at night, the meter should be set to “1.” If it’s set to “2,” then you will be charged approximately double. Find out what the typical cost is to your destination and question any high quotes. Expect to pay extra charges for travel from an airport or bus station, excessive luggage, road tolls, or reserved pick-up.

     6.  Language barriers: many Greeks speak English, and, then, many do not. Basically, “yes” (nai) sounds like “no,” and “yes” looks like “no.” So, nai, you’re screwed. But I’ll try to help you out. If a Greek responds to your question without a sound and bobs his head up or just looks up, or clicks his tongue and looks up, or any combination thereof, that’s a “no” reply. If he nods his head down at a slight angle, that’s a “yes.” Now you can understand why there are so many misunderstandings…

     7.  Beware of obnoxious trolley and bus drivers. Most tourists don’t take the trolleys or buses, and they’re missing out on true Greek drama. Where else can you, for about a dollar, get tossed around at random, roller-coaster style, get felt up by the adorable eighty-year old standing next to you, and observe, even participate in, the fighting match between the loathsome witchy woman and the intolerant detestable man? What are they fighting about, you ask? Hell if I know, and I understand Greek!

     8.  Screaming is normal. Everyone screams everywhere, all the time, on every occasion.

     9. Meals take a long time. My longest meal lasted eleven hours. (Yes, that was at a taverna, on a rainy day, with a group of friends and about fifty small bottles of tsipouro.) You must ask for the check, and then maybe you’ll get it sometime in the next sixty minutes. Tips are not expected of locals; most just round up. But because tourists tend to leave tips, they might expect one from you.

    10. Almost always, you must pay cash for your meals, especially at a taverna.

    11. Expect strikes at any moment. The first time I traveled to Greece, I was there during an election (which, in the past, meant guaranteed strikes). Everyone was on strike for about six weeks. By everyone I mean everthing--the buses, the taxis, the travel offices, the banks, the electricity, the garbage collection, and a bunch of other things. It was an amazing, smelly trip. Ah, that’s why Greeks keep their cash under their mattresses.

    12. Forgot to pack something for your trip and it’s in the middle of the night? No problem. Find a kiosk (periptero). The man (or woman) in the box has everything. Honestly, everything. Here are some things that I (or friends accompanying me) have purchased: ice cream, peach juice, milk, snickers, hazelnut chocolate, condoms, magazines, umbrellas, bandaids, shoe insoles, phone cards, bus tickets, razors, cigarettes (the #1 seller of course), Kleenex, purses, belts, crazy glue, needles and thread, newspapers, nuts, reading glasses, water, dinner dates, mail-order Russian brides--what? You’re still reading this?

    13. If you smile, giggle or laugh excessively (especially when accompanied by a naive expression) the Greeks will think that you are pitifully stupid or American, or both.

    14. Greeks drive on the shoulder on the freeways. They also tend to run red lights.

    15. Beware of the elements. Humans are frequently hit by Greek lightning. For example, if you attend a funeral in the rain, don’t bring along a metal-tipped umbrella. Earthquakes and floods are common. If you’ve rented a motorbike and fall/winter rains hit, tie your motorbike to the side of a building.

    16.  The Greek Sun is very strong (Yes, they have a different sun than we do…go figure!). So, if you want to escape sunburn (which can really mess up your vacation), do as the Greeks do: head to the beach after 3:30pm.

    17.  Everyone smokes. Even the Greek goats.

    18.  Forget anonymity. Everyone will know your name and everything about you. In fact, they already know your name…and everything about you.

    19.  A special warning to single women: if that Greek God you’re swooning over invites you to meet his family (i.e. Mom) then let me be the first to congratulate you on your engagement!

    20.  Never never drink alone.

Happy Greek Travels!

By the Way--Don't miss the comments! Tania, one of our Twitter friends, has already added some essential additions.
Please add your own or tweet them to me: @rebeccaelia

Comments

Tania

06/23/2009 5:19am

Love this post! I agree with all of them. I never get used to the toilet paper etc (!) in an exposed rubbish bin next to the toilet...BLECH :) EEWW what about the hole in the ground toilets which everyone tries to tell me are more hygienic - not sure how peeing on your feet/legs/shoes is more hygienic but anyway :)

My other suggestions are:
(as per Twitter): 'the shrieking noise you hear at 6am is not an evacuation siren, it's the fishmonger selling his wares over a loud hailer ''GGGAAAAVVVVRRRRROOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSS" ' :P

Greece has a Saints Day every day of the week so the bells at the church next door to your accommodation will start pealing at 6am

(funny how both mine centre round noise :) )

Thanks for the laugh. Nice to provide a comment in more than 140 words LOL.

Tania

Rebecca link

06/23/2009 6:15am

Tania,
Thanks for the important additions!
Yes, we all have toilet stories. As mentioned, mine are just too ugly to put into print (and we don't want to destroy the Greek tourism industry :)
BTW GGGAAAAVVVVRRRRROOOOOOSSSSSSSS are great with ouzo.
Rebecca

Steve Finikiotis link

07/06/2009 6:26pm

Rebecca,

Delightful and informative piece. Though Greece is rapidly becoming more like Western Europe in many respects, it retains its spicy Eastern flavor--especially in more remote areas. Tourists who maker the effort to venture beyond the popular tourist haunts are in for a rare treat. Experiencing the country's culture and its people are as rewarding as its epic scenery. Thank you for this...

Steve

Rebecca Elia link

07/06/2009 6:39pm

I'm glad you enjoyed this, Steve. Yes, yes and yes! Travel to Greece soon before it changes even more. Off-season travel to out-of-the-way places is the best way to experience Greece. Although modern-day Greeks may have changed (somewhat) the land and the elements still hold timeless properties. When you walk in polluted noisy busy crazy Athens, remember that the ancient city is still there, right beneath your feet. ;)

Tania

07/26/2009 2:59am

Rebecca your last comment made me remember my first trip to Greece when I was 21. I was walking through a grotty street in central Athens and went up a flight of stairs to one of the businesses upstairs - again small, dirty corridors with a dangerous looking elevator - and walked into the poky little shop and the owner opened up the curtains .... and there taking up the whole huge window space was the Parthenon. I got goosebumps - it was such a spectacular example of the dichotomy that is Athens. I still get goosebumps whenever I see the Parthenon. I make a pilgrimage every time we go to Greece - no matter what the weather - last time we went midday and it was 43 degrees. It was still breathtakingly beautiful. I stand on those polished steps of marble and wonder what great Greek philosopher might have stood there 1000s of years ago.

I love the Plaka area too - it's like a little old Greek village in the middle of downtown Athens.

Rebecca Elia link

07/26/2009 3:29am

Hi Tania,

Yes, you are absolutely right. It's a fun game to notice from how many different, usually unexpected, views one suddenly sees the Parthenon. It still amazes me, even after twenty years. I feel the same way about the enormous columns at the Temple of Olympian Zeus or at the sudden "openings" in the ground that reveal the ancient structures below. There is a bank in the center of Athens that has plexiglass floors, because they are conducting an excavation beneath it. Have you seen it? It's both strange and amazing.
And yes, the Plaka IS the little old Greek village, still.

Just four more weeks and I'm there. Counting down...

maria v link

07/30/2009 2:51am

great post - life is so different in greece for westerners, yet these things become so commonplace once a foreigner settles into life here

Rebecca Elia link

07/30/2009 12:01pm

Thanks Maria,

Yes, it is and hopefully, it does.

Oddly, there appears to be a group of "foreigners" who choose to live in Greece and yet continue to "fight" the differences. But, then, many of us don't need to move away from home to do this. :)

Brenda link

08/20/2009 5:47pm

Rebecca, great synopsis! I always try to warn people about -- besides the screaming -- the passionate way of communicating that almost always sounds like arguing, but isn't. Necessarily. On my last flight over, a young man who was planning to propose to his girlfriend on Santorini sat between a Greek woman and me, and we peppered him with guidance. Three rows ahead of us, 4 Greek men were talking in their usual way and this poor boy wanted to know what they were fighting about.
Another important thing -- and today people should do this when they travel anywhere -- is to make certain your BANK knows you're traveling and will be using your ATM and credit cards. It can be pretty devastating to have no access to cash between noon on Friday and Monday morning!
And ohhh, the toilet stories. I remember seeing the sign and saying to myself, "Really?? NOTHING??" Yikes!

Kalo taxidi!
Brenda

Rebecca Elia link

08/20/2009 6:15pm

Yes Brenda, Absolutely. Sometimes it's difficult to know if that group of passionate Greek men are threatening to kill someone for sleeping with their girlfriends or merely discussing motorbikes.

Important point about cash: Greece is a cash country, people. You can't count on using your credit cards for most tavernas, ferry rides, bus rides, or hydrofoil rides, and if you're not staying in a hotel but renting a room from the locals you'll obviously need cash for this as well. In other words, your ATM card becomes very important. Also, if you must use traveler's checks, there is a hefty 20-25 Euro charge for EACH transaction--so try to avoid this. FYI--For those of you with American Express cards, Am Ex is no longer asking that you to call them before traveling. Visa is more widely accepted than Am Ex anyway. Be sure that you write down overseas contact phone numbers for all credit and debit cards in several different locations--just in case.

Frank link

10/25/2009 10:30am

Tania,
Great info about Greece. I hope one of this days I can visit it.
I definitely would love to have it include it on my destinations here: http://www.flyawaytrip.com/destinations_europe.htm

Thanks